Before you know it you have drifted so far up or down the beach nothing looks familiar. Or you have drifted so far out that you begin to panic.
In life it happens all the time. We tend to think drifting only happens at the beach. Yet that is not the case at all.
One of the most noticeable types of drifting is marital drift.
Ask any crowd of married people who is planning on getting a divorce and few hands go up.
So why is the divorce rate so high? Because couples drift until they grow so far apart that very little is left to the marriage. Typically by the time a couple senses that they have drifted, they have drifted so far away from the shore it’s almost impossible to paddle back in.
Let’s use the acrostic D.R.I.F.T. to describe and better understand the deadly affects of drifting. You may be drifting now and not know it. Here is what it looks like.
Distraction – Sometimes I feel like the king of distraction. I’m watching a ball game and get up to go do something. Then I get caught up in a project and do not return to the game for thirty minutes. In marriage couples get distracted by work, kids, activities, and television.
Rearrange – Soon our priorities change. A couple who used to go out for dinner once a week no longer makes it a priority. Something else has taken its place. The couple who used to take long walks has allowed time on the computer to take precedence.
Immune – Sadly it no longer bothers us. No dinner date for six months and no sign of remorse. Yet it is typically at this point that we live in denial which leads us to the letter f.
Fake it – However, as we venture out into the public eye everyone thinks we have a great marriage. In fact we so good at it that when a couple breaks up it is not unusual to here, “Wow, I had not idea their marriage was in trouble.”
Top it off – In marriage it may be an affair. In one spiritual life it may be that he bails on God.
Here’s the question. Do people have affairs all the sudden? Do people bail on God overnight? Do we become obese in a week? Does our house fall apart over the weekend?
We all know the answer, but how many of us are asking the real question: Am I D.R.I.F.T.ing in my life, in my marriage, or in my physical health?
Often it is easier to drift than paddle back to shore. However, it’s time to quit drifting and start paddling!
I am Mike Henderson, pastor of New Hope Church, husband of my best friend, and proud father of five. I like to hike with my wife, golf with my kids, play basketball, read books, and start new projects. My purpose for this blog is to help people and to give people hope.